are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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