If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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