Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Randomize
