one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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