Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
