Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
