I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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