Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
