last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Randomize