Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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