i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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