your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize