And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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