I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
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