she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
