this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
