he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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