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• (312): View more from Illinois

  I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Wat???

  (312): View more from Illinois

  U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...

  (1-201): View more from New Jersey

  ok, come over...I have doritos

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• (214): View more from Texas

  My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.

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• (310): View more from California

  And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!

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• (867): View more from Yukon/N.W.Territory

  Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.

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