Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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