honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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