Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
