She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
