I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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