we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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