I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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