I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize