I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
