You're a womanizer and a bitch.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize