No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
