So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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