No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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