I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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