Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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