If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
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Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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