addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
