Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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