508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
