Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
