Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
