4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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