My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
