Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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