Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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