ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
