My room smells like vodka and shame
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
