I heard we made out
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
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