Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
