What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
