dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
sex in a hospital.. check
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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