im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
