I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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