Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I FOUND THE LEGS
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
